I'm just saying...

Quite often on a message board I participate on, someone will share an incredibly troubling tale. Anything from child or emotional/physical abuse to alcoholism/drugs to infidelity... many, many deplorable and serious situations. Some are even life-threatening.

Naturally, people want to help. They want to show support and they want to pass on advice - anything to help ease the pain of the one suffering. Presumably that advice comes from one's own life expereiences or from knowledge they've gained with professional training. Often too, advice of a revenge or spiteful "payback" nature is given.

As much as I want to help, I find myself carefully measuring what I say and am reluctant to say too much. It's a huge responsibility to give advice to someone, and huger yet when that someone is incapable of fully coping in their world. A world I have no way of knowing except for the one-sided story I've heard. Words are easy to dispense, but do I know the consequences or end result of the words I say? Will that person act on what they hear? Will those words be right for that person? Do I have the right to tell them what to do? I don't think so - there are too many variables. I can direct them to all kinds of self-help resources but I bite my tongue on telling them exactly what to do... I haven't the right and most importantly, I'm not qualified.

No way are any of us qualified to give sound advice to some of these deeply troubled souls. Those that are wouldn't be doing it on the Internet. Some of these women need and should seek professional help. Sometimes that's the best - and most - advice we should give. In the words (much wiser than I could ever mutter) of Hippocrates... "First, do no harm."

I'm just saying...